AMES, Iowa - Virgil Carr, who earned All-America honors as an Iowa State wrestler in 1961 and 1963, died May 30 in Detroit, Mich.  Carr passed away as a result of complications following a stroke.  The Waterloo, Iowa native finished fourth for Iowa State in the 157-pound weight class at the 1961 NCAA tournament. He was third for ISU at 157 pounds at the 1963 NCAA meet under head coach Harold Nichols.    Carr won the Class A Iowa high school wrestling title for Waterloo East at 145 pounds in 1957. He was the 1958 Class A champion at 154 pounds.    "Virgil was an extraordinary person," said ISU head coach Bobby Douglas. "For all he did on the mat for Iowa State, he did even more throughout the rest of his life after graduating."    Virgil earned a bachelor's degree in education from Iowa State and then earned a master's of social work from Washington (Mo.) University.  The first member of his family to attend college, Carr went on to serve as president of the United Way of Detroit and as CEO at family services of Detroit and Wayne County, and United Charities of Chicago.      In 1993, the ISU College of Education recognized Carr with its Alumni/Achievement Award. Memorials can be directed to the Virgil H. Carr Legacy Fund, in care of the United Way of Community Services of Detroit, 1212 Griswold, Detroit, Mich., 48226-1899.  For further information, call (313) 226-9222.    Virgil Carr is no relation to Nate Carr, a three-time NCAA champion at Iowa State from 1981-83.